I have been reflecting this week on the immense changes in my life this past year. Last year at this time I was in the hospital very, very sick from an infection that threatened to take my life. I was grieving the possibility and eventual reality of a hysterectomy and knowing that having children of my own was never going to happen. I was then recovering from surgery not even able to pick up or hold my precious Austin, spending six weeks away from my husband so that he could work and I could have help during my recovery. It was a very difficult period in my life.
But it all worked out for good... I am healthier than I ever have been in my life - not without problems - but feeling so much less pain and so much more energy. And now I have a baby again (not a newborn, but a baby none-the-less). God has richly blessed me. He used a painful, scary situation for good. He has allowed me to feel well enough to be a better wife and mother. And He gave us another son. I'm so thankful.
There were days when I thought I would die, and Austin would not have a mother. Yet, a year later, here I am. I realize that our lives are a vapor, and it makes each minute of breathing more precious. Children are a gift, no matter how they enter your life. I have experience loss and grief. It is hard knowing I will never be pregnant, never go through labor, never have a child formed by God in my womb. But I have two wonderful children who God knit FOR ME in another mother's womb. And that is a precious, amazing gift. Our of grief comes joy. A time for tears and a time for joy!
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